So something I feel should be addressed (but never see blogged about) is The Black List.
The Black List is real- it is a comprehensive list of aliases, real names, email address, IP addresses, phone numbers and so-called preferences of gentlemen who seem to either not realize they are time wasters, or get off on wasting a Domme’s time and appointments. It’s shared by not only our select group but a wide range of Dommes across the country, mostly by traveling or local Dommes in a particular city’s scene. We DO talk, and we DO keep track of clients who no call/no show, cancel last minute or send long winded, frantic emails designed to solicit a response for a free “get-off.” Also listed are clients who started out as normal subs but get overly attached, go beyond bounds or become dangerous in their obsessions with their Mistresses.
The BDSM community on the whole looks out for each other, but especially our very own Philly Sister Dommes. Be forewarned that if you contact a Domme and claim to have seen us, we will have a record of it and will be able to verify. Likewise if we are seeing someone new, a reference and a deposit may be demanded to make sure that you are sincere. If you provide a false reference you will be ignored outright. There are those out there that are too cheap to put out for a real session, and therefore try to get their rocks off by pretending to be sincere, or are just too stupid to realize that a session is blocked off for you and you alone, and if you don’t call to confirm it’s not considered booked, or if you cancel last minute, that you are now on the shit list of that Domina.
Most of us have a good bullshit meter and also are willing to allow for the real situations that come up- hey, we all know that work and emergencies do happen- but we each have a limit. Cross it, and never get a real session in the city of your choice again. If you truly offend you will be posted to the public Black List websites, where your name, phone number, email and any other relevant info will be made public for easy search engine inquiries- which is VERY unfavorable as most of us Google names and phone numbers these days… The internet is a wonderful, terrible thing. Not the sort of website most people would like to find their personal info on and easily found via search engine, no?
Time Wasters also waste money; for a lot of us, this is our career. We are good at it for a reason, and our discretion and ability to fulfill your kink is the reason for the tribute. Perhaps they don’t know that they also are wasting time for a sub who could have served their Mistress and had their needs met until the desire strikes again, as if is often wont to do.
In short- make sure you use some common sense when booking with a Dominatrix. If you don’t know that you can keep your appointment, or if you are easily confused by email, then don’t schedule one. Not only are you being disrespectful to your Mistress, but you are hogging the space of a sub that actually needs the relief a session can bring. Wasting our time is also wasting a fellow slave’s, and being rude gets your nowhere….
The Philly Dominas